Links
Archives
BUT SO WHAT IF I SIMPLY SHOOT?
Monday, August 30, 2004
A comprehensive write-up on the diversity of the Chinese race:
Today, in Malaysia, there is no longer just the Chinese. Along the way, the Chinese people divided beyond dialects and religious faith. We now have denomination within the Chinese. The major three groups are :- Regular, Cina, and Ah Beng.
The Regular group is the minority, making up less than 20% of the Chinese people. This group has the following characteristics:
1. Speaks English as the first language.
2. Thinks the world owes them a living.
3. Uses the Internet more than the other two groups combined.
4. Loves the iPod and/or IKEA.
5. Watches one or more of the following TV series: "Sex And The City", "Friends", or "CSI.
6. Thinks that the Regular group is way larger than it is and makes fun of the other groups, particularly the Ah Beng group. Why? Because it's fun.
Recent studies have also shown that there is a growing splinter group within the Regular group known as the CPWTTANC group. (CPWTTANC is short for Chinese People Who Think They Are Not Chinese.) This growing subgroup are considered elitist by some and are found making statements like "I wish I were in the U.S." or "This never happened when I was studying in Australia." They also tend to speak with an unidentifiable accent. The women may also prefer to date white men from foreign countries with the excuse that local men just "don't understand me" and have the secret desire to be taken away to the U.S. to live in a sitcom. They think that they are white instead of yellow, and anyone darker than them are black.
The second Chinese group, Cina make up approximately 55% of the Chinese community. (Cina is derived from the Malay word Cina which means Chinese and is pronounced "chee-na". And you will have to say it in a condescending tone for effect.) This group is considered mainstream and contribute to the numbers that reflect development in the country. They are the masses in context of the Chinese community. In other words, if you want to sell something to the masses of Chinese people, the Cina is it. The Cina are identified by the following traits:
1. Speaks Mandarin or Cantonese as the first language.
2. Generally quiet, self-effacing, and obliging but are actually shrewd and calculative. Possibly racist.
3. Sees Taiwan as the place to be.
4. More likely to forward chain email to people in their address book.
5. Goes to "Halo" Caf¨¦ or "Wow Wow" Caf¨¦ BY CHOICE at least three times a year.
6. Has Astro hardwired to Wah Lai Toi.
7. Calls a music video an MTV instead of music video.
8. Knows all the dim sum dishes by name
9. Seventy percent of lighting at home generated by flourescent lights.
The last group are known as the Ah Bengs . This term was probably made up by the Regulars in the early 80s during the cultural invasion that saw the mass import of music and movies from countries like Hong Kong, Taiwan, and to some extent, Japan. This phenomenon saw the more open-minded and runaway members of the Cina group defect into Ah Bengs and its feminine equivalent, Ah Lian. They just took their Alan Tam and Anita Mui a little too seriously. Perhaps the most made-fun-of group not only by its own Chinese people but by people of other races, the Ah Bengs are often seen as people living on the edge and have more flamboyant tastes. One may identify the Ah Beng by these tell-tale signs:
1. Built-in visual self-defense mechanism that keeps people away from them.
2. Have enough amplifiers in their one car to power speakers for six cars.
3. Hair not in their original colour.
4. Volume of voice is automatically five decibels higher than everyone else.
5. Excessive use of the phrase "Kan Ni Na Bu Ciao Chee Bai". (Although, to be fair, some members of the Regular group have been reported to use the phrase on a daily basis as well.)
6. Once a fan of one of the following groups: Vengaboys, Dr Bombay,Aqua, or the Cheeky Girls.
7. Their Proton car does not look like a Proton car due to modifications.
8. For the Ah Lians, have at least one bag fashioned after a furry animal complete with the head.
Today, in Malaysia, there is no longer just the Chinese. Along the way, the Chinese people divided beyond dialects and religious faith. We now have denomination within the Chinese. The major three groups are :- Regular, Cina, and Ah Beng.
The Regular group is the minority, making up less than 20% of the Chinese people. This group has the following characteristics:
1. Speaks English as the first language.
2. Thinks the world owes them a living.
3. Uses the Internet more than the other two groups combined.
4. Loves the iPod and/or IKEA.
5. Watches one or more of the following TV series: "Sex And The City", "Friends", or "CSI.
6. Thinks that the Regular group is way larger than it is and makes fun of the other groups, particularly the Ah Beng group. Why? Because it's fun.
Recent studies have also shown that there is a growing splinter group within the Regular group known as the CPWTTANC group. (CPWTTANC is short for Chinese People Who Think They Are Not Chinese.) This growing subgroup are considered elitist by some and are found making statements like "I wish I were in the U.S." or "This never happened when I was studying in Australia." They also tend to speak with an unidentifiable accent. The women may also prefer to date white men from foreign countries with the excuse that local men just "don't understand me" and have the secret desire to be taken away to the U.S. to live in a sitcom. They think that they are white instead of yellow, and anyone darker than them are black.
The second Chinese group, Cina make up approximately 55% of the Chinese community. (Cina is derived from the Malay word Cina which means Chinese and is pronounced "chee-na". And you will have to say it in a condescending tone for effect.) This group is considered mainstream and contribute to the numbers that reflect development in the country. They are the masses in context of the Chinese community. In other words, if you want to sell something to the masses of Chinese people, the Cina is it. The Cina are identified by the following traits:
1. Speaks Mandarin or Cantonese as the first language.
2. Generally quiet, self-effacing, and obliging but are actually shrewd and calculative. Possibly racist.
3. Sees Taiwan as the place to be.
4. More likely to forward chain email to people in their address book.
5. Goes to "Halo" Caf¨¦ or "Wow Wow" Caf¨¦ BY CHOICE at least three times a year.
6. Has Astro hardwired to Wah Lai Toi.
7. Calls a music video an MTV instead of music video.
8. Knows all the dim sum dishes by name
9. Seventy percent of lighting at home generated by flourescent lights.
The last group are known as the Ah Bengs . This term was probably made up by the Regulars in the early 80s during the cultural invasion that saw the mass import of music and movies from countries like Hong Kong, Taiwan, and to some extent, Japan. This phenomenon saw the more open-minded and runaway members of the Cina group defect into Ah Bengs and its feminine equivalent, Ah Lian. They just took their Alan Tam and Anita Mui a little too seriously. Perhaps the most made-fun-of group not only by its own Chinese people but by people of other races, the Ah Bengs are often seen as people living on the edge and have more flamboyant tastes. One may identify the Ah Beng by these tell-tale signs:
1. Built-in visual self-defense mechanism that keeps people away from them.
2. Have enough amplifiers in their one car to power speakers for six cars.
3. Hair not in their original colour.
4. Volume of voice is automatically five decibels higher than everyone else.
5. Excessive use of the phrase "Kan Ni Na Bu Ciao Chee Bai". (Although, to be fair, some members of the Regular group have been reported to use the phrase on a daily basis as well.)
6. Once a fan of one of the following groups: Vengaboys, Dr Bombay,Aqua, or the Cheeky Girls.
7. Their Proton car does not look like a Proton car due to modifications.
8. For the Ah Lians, have at least one bag fashioned after a furry animal complete with the head.
Monday, August 09, 2004
If I were to make a time capsule, I’d insert a note in it, bury it, and open it again in 40 years’ time. The note will read:
Dear ol’ Joshua
Two questions I'd like to ask you:
Firstly, is your email still johaste@yahoo.com? If you have been upgrading your computer consistently, you must have a “supercomputer” by now. It probably can do all kinds of things with great haste. But you may not have such speed anymore.
Secondly, is your ICQ nickname still Hasten? Congratulations if your “Hasten dream” has come true. But don’t be too hard on yourself if you are no longer as quick as you wished to be.
A few things I want to remind you about:
Firstly, remember not to talk too much about your younger days, or boast about your “glory days”. People may not like to hear about how swift you were back then. The young people do catch up. And they catch on really faster than you think.
Secondly, make sure you do not make condescending remarks about the younger generation by saying “how good you were” or “how great things were” during your time. It will be tempting to reminisce aloud on how they can’t bring back the “good ol’ days”. But don’t do that, because the good ol’ days are in the past, and it will always stay in the past. They can’t bring them back, and neither can you.
Thirdly, you will be wiser, older, and more experienced by now. But don’t forget that you may think you are wiser than you really are. You will feel the urge to share your experiences in an attempt to seek acknowledgement, admiration, or respect from the young ones. It will be difficult resist this temptation, but please remember that real acknowledgement, or any admirable respect is never earned through boasting. It never was, it never has been, and it never will. Age doesn’t change that.
Fourthly, when you feel like you have a lot of things to say, please don’t have the preconceived idea that everyone will love to hear it. You may think that your young listeners will be at a loss if they don’t have the chance to appreciate your thoughts. But please remember that they will not have the heart to tell you if they find you irrelevant or boring. They will never tell you, out of “respect” for an aged man. So please remember to tell yourself that, because no one will. Because if you are not careful, you will have no idea when or how you have turned into a boring, irrelevant storyteller.
Fifthly, please remind yourself constantly to give advice only when your counsel is sought. You will easily become irritating, or even offensive if like to give unsolicited advice. The younger generation may not be as inferior to your generation as you think. They are better, faster, and stronger than you now. Giving them untimely counsel will make them feel as if they do not have a mind of their own. The younger ones do not like to be implied as though they are not wise enough or not able to think on their own, any more than you do.
Sixthly, please don’t become difficult, or give people trouble as you cope with the shortcomings of old age. Not only towards your friends or acquaintances. Even towards your own flesh and blood, because they deserve a shot in life without being hindered by its own.
Last but not least, please give extra caution to refrain from crude comments or jokes. You will easily be written off as a dirty old man. They don’t sound the same coming from an aged person.
Yes, times will get difficult as you try to struggle against the feeling that you’re past your prime. It will not be easy when you feel as though you are not needed anymore. But pride will not salvage anything to make things better. After all these years, if you still remember the kind of respect you gave those who embraced the future with grace, you should know better what to do.
Hey man. (Yeah, no one from the younger generation can call you “boy” anymore) You had your shot. And thank God for that.
From,
Yourself.
Dear ol’ Joshua
Two questions I'd like to ask you:
Firstly, is your email still johaste@yahoo.com? If you have been upgrading your computer consistently, you must have a “supercomputer” by now. It probably can do all kinds of things with great haste. But you may not have such speed anymore.
Secondly, is your ICQ nickname still Hasten? Congratulations if your “Hasten dream” has come true. But don’t be too hard on yourself if you are no longer as quick as you wished to be.
A few things I want to remind you about:
Firstly, remember not to talk too much about your younger days, or boast about your “glory days”. People may not like to hear about how swift you were back then. The young people do catch up. And they catch on really faster than you think.
Secondly, make sure you do not make condescending remarks about the younger generation by saying “how good you were” or “how great things were” during your time. It will be tempting to reminisce aloud on how they can’t bring back the “good ol’ days”. But don’t do that, because the good ol’ days are in the past, and it will always stay in the past. They can’t bring them back, and neither can you.
Thirdly, you will be wiser, older, and more experienced by now. But don’t forget that you may think you are wiser than you really are. You will feel the urge to share your experiences in an attempt to seek acknowledgement, admiration, or respect from the young ones. It will be difficult resist this temptation, but please remember that real acknowledgement, or any admirable respect is never earned through boasting. It never was, it never has been, and it never will. Age doesn’t change that.
Fourthly, when you feel like you have a lot of things to say, please don’t have the preconceived idea that everyone will love to hear it. You may think that your young listeners will be at a loss if they don’t have the chance to appreciate your thoughts. But please remember that they will not have the heart to tell you if they find you irrelevant or boring. They will never tell you, out of “respect” for an aged man. So please remember to tell yourself that, because no one will. Because if you are not careful, you will have no idea when or how you have turned into a boring, irrelevant storyteller.
Fifthly, please remind yourself constantly to give advice only when your counsel is sought. You will easily become irritating, or even offensive if like to give unsolicited advice. The younger generation may not be as inferior to your generation as you think. They are better, faster, and stronger than you now. Giving them untimely counsel will make them feel as if they do not have a mind of their own. The younger ones do not like to be implied as though they are not wise enough or not able to think on their own, any more than you do.
Sixthly, please don’t become difficult, or give people trouble as you cope with the shortcomings of old age. Not only towards your friends or acquaintances. Even towards your own flesh and blood, because they deserve a shot in life without being hindered by its own.
Last but not least, please give extra caution to refrain from crude comments or jokes. You will easily be written off as a dirty old man. They don’t sound the same coming from an aged person.
Yes, times will get difficult as you try to struggle against the feeling that you’re past your prime. It will not be easy when you feel as though you are not needed anymore. But pride will not salvage anything to make things better. After all these years, if you still remember the kind of respect you gave those who embraced the future with grace, you should know better what to do.
Hey man. (Yeah, no one from the younger generation can call you “boy” anymore) You had your shot. And thank God for that.
From,
Yourself.
Sunday, August 08, 2004
What is loyalty?
Footballers change clubs as easily as they change jerseys. Even if they do not speak ill of their former clubs, it doesn’t change the fact that they will kicking the ball towards the other post.
Basketball players shoot at different hoops when a better deal comes along. Some, while claiming to no intentions of switching allegiance, admit wanting to feel what it’s like to be courted as free agents. Kobe Bryant was one of them.
MJ himself shot for the Wizards. The Bulls are no longer the Bulls since Phil Jackson left. What made the Bulls lose its identity? Phil Jackson’s transfer? MJ’s retirement? Or loyalty’s absence?
Some people are like a lost cause. No matter how hard you try, things just don’t change. But you don’t give up on such people, and you don’t simply forget about them, or replace them. But sometimes, it still happens. Some call it abandonment. Some call it nonchalance. Some call it lack of loyalty.
Loyalty seems to be linked along the lines of friendship and patriotism. But what exactly is loyalty today, and how far does it exist? Let’s check some of the ways we usually describe loyalty:
You dutifully keep up on something because it is your task to do it. That’s not loyalty. That is responsibility.
You faithfully remain on something because it has been good to you. That’s not loyalty. That is fulfilling an obligation.
You stick on with something because you have no other choice. That’s not loyalty. That’s lack of option.
You hang on with something because there is no higher bidder. That’s not loyalty. That’s taking a ride.
You stay on with something because it benefits you. That’s not loyalty. That’s an opportunist’s game.
So, how can we phrase the meaning of loyalty. Maybe we can put it together this way: You yield towards something not because you have no other choice, not because there is no higher bidder, not because of its benefits, but because you find enough reason in it. Now, is that loyalty?
Sounds highly acceptable. Even if we assume that is what loyalty really is, one question remains. Isn’t having a reason to cling on considered a factor of “benefit” in itself? If loyalty depends on reason, it is gone the moment reason is gone. Perhaps loyalty must not be dependent on any other factor, including reason, in order to remain as true loyalty.
Let’s try rephrasing its definition: Loyalty is the attitude of yielding towards something not because you have no other choice, not because there is no higher bidder, not because of its benefits, and not because you find reason in it. Now, doesn’t that sound more like foolishness? Is real loyalty more like blind allegiance then?
Allegiance. That’s another word I want to talk about. You pledge allegiance towards something because you want to see something good come out of it, even if it is not necessarily for yourself. Sounds noble. But the factor of benefit is still there, isn’t it? The opportunist’s game is still on as long as the factor of benefit is present. So allegiance doesn’t really equate itself with loyalty.
So, what do I think loyalty is? Is it about being blind? Maybe. About being foolish? Perhaps.
I think loyalty is not dependent on any factor. It has to exist independently. It is about patience. It is about waiting. It is about being stubborn.
Footballers change clubs as easily as they change jerseys. Even if they do not speak ill of their former clubs, it doesn’t change the fact that they will kicking the ball towards the other post.
Basketball players shoot at different hoops when a better deal comes along. Some, while claiming to no intentions of switching allegiance, admit wanting to feel what it’s like to be courted as free agents. Kobe Bryant was one of them.
MJ himself shot for the Wizards. The Bulls are no longer the Bulls since Phil Jackson left. What made the Bulls lose its identity? Phil Jackson’s transfer? MJ’s retirement? Or loyalty’s absence?
Some people are like a lost cause. No matter how hard you try, things just don’t change. But you don’t give up on such people, and you don’t simply forget about them, or replace them. But sometimes, it still happens. Some call it abandonment. Some call it nonchalance. Some call it lack of loyalty.
Loyalty seems to be linked along the lines of friendship and patriotism. But what exactly is loyalty today, and how far does it exist? Let’s check some of the ways we usually describe loyalty:
You dutifully keep up on something because it is your task to do it. That’s not loyalty. That is responsibility.
You faithfully remain on something because it has been good to you. That’s not loyalty. That is fulfilling an obligation.
You stick on with something because you have no other choice. That’s not loyalty. That’s lack of option.
You hang on with something because there is no higher bidder. That’s not loyalty. That’s taking a ride.
You stay on with something because it benefits you. That’s not loyalty. That’s an opportunist’s game.
So, how can we phrase the meaning of loyalty. Maybe we can put it together this way: You yield towards something not because you have no other choice, not because there is no higher bidder, not because of its benefits, but because you find enough reason in it. Now, is that loyalty?
Sounds highly acceptable. Even if we assume that is what loyalty really is, one question remains. Isn’t having a reason to cling on considered a factor of “benefit” in itself? If loyalty depends on reason, it is gone the moment reason is gone. Perhaps loyalty must not be dependent on any other factor, including reason, in order to remain as true loyalty.
Let’s try rephrasing its definition: Loyalty is the attitude of yielding towards something not because you have no other choice, not because there is no higher bidder, not because of its benefits, and not because you find reason in it. Now, doesn’t that sound more like foolishness? Is real loyalty more like blind allegiance then?
Allegiance. That’s another word I want to talk about. You pledge allegiance towards something because you want to see something good come out of it, even if it is not necessarily for yourself. Sounds noble. But the factor of benefit is still there, isn’t it? The opportunist’s game is still on as long as the factor of benefit is present. So allegiance doesn’t really equate itself with loyalty.
So, what do I think loyalty is? Is it about being blind? Maybe. About being foolish? Perhaps.
I think loyalty is not dependent on any factor. It has to exist independently. It is about patience. It is about waiting. It is about being stubborn.
Sunday, August 01, 2004
Ever get those forwarded emails about life or friendship, those soppy ones, the ones lined with laces, decorated with nice butterflies and flowers? Either they have those cute puppies or piggies to add a docile, adorable theme to it? The ones that tell you to read it carefully, and you will find it meaningful? The ones that ask you to forward it to as many friends as you can, and if you get them back, it shows that they care for you too?
I normally won’t give two hoots for such emails. But this one’s an exception. Of all the forwarded emails I have in my mailbox, this one is different. No frills, no laces. No soppy lines. No cute puppies or piggies. All it has is an old, fat mouse on the header and the footer. (Too bad it can't be shown here) Hilariously crude, but it speaks some level of truth:
-----------------------------------------------------
As I Mature
I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.
I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just assholes.
I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.
I've learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you'd better have a big willy or huge boobs.
I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more screwed up than you think.
I've learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you're finished.
I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.
I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be a lot of money to take its place!
I've learned that 99% of the time when something isn't working in your house, one of your kids did it
I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away.
Pass this along to 5 friends... trust me, they'll appreciate it. Who knows, maybe something good will happen.
If not...tough shit.
-----------------------------------------------------
I normally won’t give two hoots for such emails. But this one’s an exception. Of all the forwarded emails I have in my mailbox, this one is different. No frills, no laces. No soppy lines. No cute puppies or piggies. All it has is an old, fat mouse on the header and the footer. (Too bad it can't be shown here) Hilariously crude, but it speaks some level of truth:
-----------------------------------------------------
As I Mature
I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.
I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just assholes.
I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.
I've learned that you can get by on charm for about fifteen minutes. After that, you'd better have a big willy or huge boobs.
I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they are more screwed up than you think.
I've learned that you can keep vomiting long after you think you're finished.
I've learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.
I've learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be a lot of money to take its place!
I've learned that 99% of the time when something isn't working in your house, one of your kids did it
I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon and all the less important ones just never go away.
Pass this along to 5 friends... trust me, they'll appreciate it. Who knows, maybe something good will happen.
If not...tough shit.
-----------------------------------------------------
My obscure spot overlooks a bridge that separates two worlds. It has an eerie yet serene view of tropical trees under the twilight sky, when the grass is still moist with nature’s dew. As tranquil as the grave, yet peaceful as a plateau on a hill in the countryside.
The tropical trees looked rather bald this time. It used to look full-headed, but more gaps are beginning to appear between the leaves. Is it my imagination, or has the number of trees become less? It can’t be caused by the ground beneath it, because the ground doesn’t quake much in this part of the world. The grass is still wet from this morning’s sudden outpour. The bridge still stood the same, holding two worlds together, standing firm in its place.
I’ve been losing eyebrow hair! It used to almost meet in the middle, but the gap between the eyebrows is getting wider with each passing month. Is it my imagination, or has the number of strands getting less? Maybe it was lost because the ground under it folded too often. My hair’s still a little wet from tonight’s session at the pool. There’s still work to be done on dry ground. Have to stretch myself between more than two worlds at one time, but I’m still standing firm in my place.
I remember the last two times I was here. The first time I was here, I was troubled in soul and mind. The air was still and cold. There was an aura of fear that made me keep looking over my shoulder. The place gave me no solution, but it gave me a new perspective.
The other time I was here was when I was mulling over my plans to pursue a change in my life. The place seemed to have changed from my first visit. Its atmosphere was different, as if it were welcoming my presence for the occasion. There was a slow breeze, and the air smelled fresh. The place gave me no new ideas, but it gave me encouragement.
This time, it has changed again. It changed as if it was trying to tell me something.
Seeing how the place seems to change every time I visit it, it leads me to ponder on one thing. I’m curious... is it the place that changed each time, or is it me?
I wonder how my fourth visit will be like.
The tropical trees looked rather bald this time. It used to look full-headed, but more gaps are beginning to appear between the leaves. Is it my imagination, or has the number of trees become less? It can’t be caused by the ground beneath it, because the ground doesn’t quake much in this part of the world. The grass is still wet from this morning’s sudden outpour. The bridge still stood the same, holding two worlds together, standing firm in its place.
I’ve been losing eyebrow hair! It used to almost meet in the middle, but the gap between the eyebrows is getting wider with each passing month. Is it my imagination, or has the number of strands getting less? Maybe it was lost because the ground under it folded too often. My hair’s still a little wet from tonight’s session at the pool. There’s still work to be done on dry ground. Have to stretch myself between more than two worlds at one time, but I’m still standing firm in my place.
I remember the last two times I was here. The first time I was here, I was troubled in soul and mind. The air was still and cold. There was an aura of fear that made me keep looking over my shoulder. The place gave me no solution, but it gave me a new perspective.
The other time I was here was when I was mulling over my plans to pursue a change in my life. The place seemed to have changed from my first visit. Its atmosphere was different, as if it were welcoming my presence for the occasion. There was a slow breeze, and the air smelled fresh. The place gave me no new ideas, but it gave me encouragement.
This time, it has changed again. It changed as if it was trying to tell me something.
Seeing how the place seems to change every time I visit it, it leads me to ponder on one thing. I’m curious... is it the place that changed each time, or is it me?
I wonder how my fourth visit will be like.
